so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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