Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
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