what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
