So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Randomize
