My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
