As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
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