just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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