I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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