I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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