Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
