At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
