she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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