Hey man sorry I got all grabby
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize