dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize