i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
the room spins SO much faster in panama
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
