You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
