ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
