Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
this beer tastes like vomit already
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
