found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
he laminated a picture of his dick.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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