i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
