He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I have post one night stand depression
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
