whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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