it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
it glows. i had to have it.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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