i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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