i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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