i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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