Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
