Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
