Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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