You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
