I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
