Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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