it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
