If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
