I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
