Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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