i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
