she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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