No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
