I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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