So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Randomize
