if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize