Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize