Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize