Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
you never un-have a 4some
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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