your room smells of hookers.
And success
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
