I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
