Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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