Just mADE A PArabola og urine
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
