it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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